Gratitude List 04/02/2019
Further to yesterday.
I woke this morning feeling a little drained, emotionally drained. Yesterday, I was met with my biggest test yet since being in recovery. Despite the challenge, as time has passed, I have been able to see plenty of positives. That has continued to be the case today and, upon reflection, I am full of gratitude.
Today I am grateful that this challenge has not led to me acting out in a negative way. Who knows what this could’ve led to. Working the program means I was less vulnerable.
Today I am grateful that my humility and consideration overpowered any resentments that briefly came to mind.
Today I am grateful I have been in recovery for the last year. Had I not been, I seriously believe I would be in a very, very dark place today.
Today I am grateful that my reaction has been to carry on as normal – which has been to work the program in my daily life. Being in recovery means that no desperate or drastic changes to my behaviour were necessary.
Today I am grateful I intuitively knew how to deal with this test (that would’ve previously baffled me). On reflection, the tools I have gained through this program were working without any conscience thought of my own. It was a miracle.
Today I am grateful my ego and self-will was not in control. Instead, my greater power carried me through. Under pressure, it would’ve definitely been the other way round. Does this mean my natural behaviour/reactions have changed?
Today I am grateful that this has reinforced my faith in this program and that ‘it works if I work it.’
Today I am grateful for that ‘moment of silence to remind myself why I am here’. I’m here because I need to be!
Today I am grateful I am not alone. Thanks to the honesty I have practiced, I have been able to share this situation with my partner, my fellows and my sponsor. Such a blessing to have this support instead of suffering alone.
Today I am mostly grateful that two people, who I severely harmed in the past, have had some release. They have been suffering and this would have been a big lift for both of them. I pray that my future conduct will assist in further amends.